{I'm Lame}

First, the non-lame part... I was thinking of not drinking for an entire month to see how much it would help with losing weight.  I briefly mentioned it to C today and she thought it would be pretty cool also.  D overheard me and bet that I couldn't do it.  I, of course, insisted that I could, and we shook on it.  So, it's official now:  I am going to be alcohol free for 31 days (makes me sound like an alcoholic lol).  Perfect timing with tomorrow being May 1.  :)

On to my lameness... So, I'm really interested in C. I think he's hilarious (my huge weakness).  I had a small crush on R also and, at one point, thought I was more interested in R than C.  Turns out that spending more time with C has made me more into him.  I didn't quite realize how much so until R invited me to a get-together at one of the guy's place.  I initially said I should be able to go but then the more I thought about it, the more I thought I didn't want to because I like C.  THAT'S SO LAME AND RIDICULOUS of me.  C has already said, "I have a rule that I do not date co-workers." WTH is my deal then? Blah.  This is not like me at all to care about what a guy thinks who's already stated he won't date me.

Well, here's something I just thought about.  I told R that we should hang out while sober since the other two times we've hung out we've both been pretty drunk (I know I was anyway). So, I haven't really talked to him since that last drunken time. I figured, if he was interested then he'd contact me. That was a little more than a week ago. The first time he invites me to do anything is to go drinking with the guys? Really?  THAT'S pretty lame. I'm not impressed with that really.  What I AM impressed with is a guy taking charge. That's what confuses me with C; he's done that twice now and I like it.  Gah.

Confuzzeled

{Huh}

Interesting night.  Hung out with C after my half shift at work.  He text me to see if I was going to J's party. I said I didn't know, that I'd just gotten off work.  He said lets get something to eat. I also went shopping with him.  That was a new experience too since I haven't gone shopping with a guy since my ex-husband.  Anyway, after the stores closed he was driving me back to my place and asked if I wanted to go to Pitcher's.  I said sure but then he changed his mind; said he didn't want to get drunk.  Well, I have no idea then what to do on a Saturday night besides go to places that serve alcohol (in Aurora anyway).  We were gonna try a movie and I jokingly said on the way to it that if all else fails he can watch "Meet the Robinsons" with me.  Then he suggested we get a movie from red box and watch it.  After discussing how disgusting both our places were, I believed him when he said his was the worst and so we watched it at my place.  Nothing happened though, which is fine.  I know what I WON'T do with him haha!

It's just interesting because ever since we had the talk that we weren't going to start anything because we work together and because of H, we seem to be spending more time together. I'm not sure how it feels though.  Right now it does feel like just friends hanging out.  I think we all know though that women and men cannot be JUST friends.  That never works out.

My lead at work played this game with me the other day, naming two guys in our section and asking which one I'd sleep with of the two.  Only guys in our section were named. C was in my top 5 but I definitely know what I want and what I don't want.  I WON'T be sleeping with anyone unless I know they're mine and I won't be sharing them with anyone else.  I'm not looking for friends with benefits.  I'm looking for someone to hang out with, share experiences with, have FUN with.  I want someone I can snuggle with on the couch while watching a movie.  I'm NOT looking for a husband.  I refuse to settle for less.  So, we'll just see.

On another note, my place is filthy.  Haha!!

{Crazy life}

Life's been a little crazy lately.  For my last break, all I did was drink (except for the one day I was at work). It was tons of fun.  I just don't really like going out that much I guess.  I had a talk with a co-worker/friend last week that we weren't going to pursue anything because we work together and because of H. That's fine. I think what bothered me the most though was a small talk with my lead at work.  He asked me what I thought the greatest aspect of myself was.  I'm a shy person anyway, so no matter what I thought I never would have been able to say it anyway.  I honestly don't know what it is though.  I only know that I'm attractive to guys for sex. That seems to be all they want from me anyway.  So, he says you know the aspect D liked the most, right?  My boobs.  Yeah, so he's saying also my greatest aspect is my physical attraction to guys? Thanks. I hate that.  I really do. Other than that, I really don't know what guys like about me, if anything.  I know what I like about myself.  I am happy with myself.  I feel that I'm self-confident (for the most part haha).  I know what I want and what I don't want. I know what I'll allow to be acceptable and what's unacceptable for me. His talk anyway got me a little depressed.  I felt like thanking him for pointing out my greatest weakness and self-doubt to me. What's funny is, as much as I do want a boyfriend for the companionship, I kinda don't because of the commitment of it. I know I'm doing pretty good on my own.

{Drama, Drama, Drama}

Well, not really since I try to stay away from the drama as much as possible. I hate that co-workers seem to be my only dating options.

  I let him tattoo me though.

{I'm officially a Coloradan}

Remember previously where I said I was told I'd have to retake my drivers license test since my license had been expired for more than a year?  Well, two-three weeks ago I went to the license office in which I live in now to take said test.  I got there at 4pm and they closed at 5pm.  At 4:15, they offered last call for the written test.  I almost stepped out of line to go take it but something held me back and told me to ask just one more person if I HAVE to take the test.  I told the lady I was prior AF, stationed at Buckley AFB until Sept 30, 2011 and then went reserves. I told her I had a GA license that was expired a year and a half but that in GA I had 2 years to renew it after expiration.  I said but now that I'm out of the AF, I want to make CO my state and asked what I needed to do to get a CO license.  She asked and told me I have 6 months from the date of separation to get a CO license. SA-Weet!!  So, they took my photo and a few days ago, got my CO license in the mail.  Talk about being ecstatic about not having to retest!!  Woot!!  :)