{Chevelle is A-Mazing!}

Ok, honestly, I do not remember the first half of their show. I was pretty much black-out drunk with only little tidbits coming through every now and then. We went to The Cheeky Monk first before heading over to the Ogden Theater for the show. What I do know is I had tons of fun. We've got good peeps we work with and who I'd consider friends. I've got pics but I'll have to post them later. I need to drag myself out of my warm bed to get ready for the gym out there in the cold, Colorado weather. Yay.

{Gotta love your family...}

I talked to my grandparents today. Seriously, as much as I love them they also drive me crazy. My grandpa is always on me about not having a boyfriend and when am I going to have kids so he can have more great-grand kids. So, I'm talking to my grandma and my grandpa asks if I have a boyfriend yet. I say no. He's in the background BTW asking this stuff. So, he says, "No?! Why not?" My grandma says, "Because she's not ready." Really? I do not recall saying this ever. He says, "Not ready?! Doesn't she want kids?" My grandma says, "No!" What?!?! I've never said that. I've known since I was like 15 I wanted kids. So then I speak up in THEIR conversation and say that's not true at all and my grandma repeats it. Geez. If I knew what exactly I was doing wrong, I'd do something about it. All I know right now is I work too much to meet anyone. Dating people at work hasn't exactly worked out either even though it would be more convenient! LOL  What's ironic is I KNOW as soon as I do start dating someone, they'll give me a hard time about that too. Mostly, I can see them ALL saying they thought I'd "gone the other way" or something like that. They have in the past. Oh well. What can ya do? Trust me, I'd rather be at home making and raising babies than all this working I'm doing.

I really thought I'd be married with babies right now myself. It's probably why I married so young in the first place and, hence, my down fall.

Anyway, on another note we're about to get some crazy cold weather! Colorado's a beautiful state in the Autumn and I wish it'd just stay that way for a few months before bringing in cold Winter weather instead of just a few weeks of Fall. What I'd really like is some good time off to enjoy said Autumn weather. I've got two very long weeks ahead of me to suffer through before being about to enjoy GOOD time off.

Tired Cat

On a funny note, I have a huge pimple under the skin on my cheek and another in the crease of my nose. Of course I'm entirely self-conscious about it and swear that's all the anyone at the gym noticed. ;)

{Full circle}

Life's been progressing, many changes have been made. I moved into my own place and let the lease with my roommate end. She didn't live there anyway and the place was just more room than I needed (and wanted to take care of). I got a 2br/2ba condo I'm renting not far from work. I've been here for almost 2 months now and I do like it so far. I've still got boxes to go through but for the most part, I think everything's in its place.

I also got a new job. That really did just pretty much fall in my lap. I emailed a guy I knew about a job in Hawaii I'd heard of. He said it was with a different company but that his section had an opening I was qualified for. The next day he emailed me about another job in his section I was qualified for. His confidence in me is amazing and very uplifting. Especially because I feel like an idiot in my current job being lead. Anyway, I applied for it and got it. I start Nov 12.

That's really all that's been going on. I've got my crush but letting it die. He's recently single and that's just bad news. It was safe to crush before when he wasn't available!! haha

{Life goes on}

I helped C move 2 days ago. I even went as far as helping him clean some. After helping him put his bed together I left.  I was there for almost, if not more than, 7 hours. Yesterday he called me to tell me he bought a new T.V. Today he texted me to see if I wanted to get lunch with him. I told him I didn't think it was a good idea. He seriously asked me why. I was like because I like you. Then he made a joke. Really? Thanks. I absolutely wanted to go. I like him & I like his son. I can't let him continue to do this though, no matter how bad I want it. He obviously does not.

Anyway, on a lighter note, I'm very excited for fall. I love fall weather & everything associated with it. The cool crisp air, apple pie, the changing of the leaves, pumpkin farms, football, and corn mazes. It's the perfect snuggle time.

{Certification}

My certification is complete. I worked on another crew today to certify. The certification lasted 8 hours or so. Good grief.  I passed though, so that's always good.  Now, I'll have the stress of being a lead. I won't lie, I'm kinda hoping they make J the primary lead.  I'm good with that.

{Agh! Stress!}

I'm so completely stressed about work! I woke up at 2 in the morning thinking about it. That's INSANE!! It's all because of Ross too. I'm worried because in our Form 5 at work, he didn't give it to me to sign but talked to Russ about it. Is this another instance where he has an opinion about something I've done/not done but isn't sharing it with me directly?! I don't know. I have to wait until I get into work tomorrow to find out. Did I offend him again somehow? I don't know. Ugh. I really do not like that guy. I hate that they compare Jen and I on everything. Don't they realize we have two different learning styles?! I hate being judged about every little thing. I feel judged anyway. It's because I judge myself. I should NEVER have agreed to do this training and certification. I've only been here for 9 months! Not even 9 months yet. Jen memorizes everything she sees, she knows it and I know it. I can't do that. I don't have that kind of memory. But she certified and now the pressure is on. If the test is truly based on JUST what's in the JQS, I know I'll be fine but Ross throws so much more into it that it stresses me out. Russ isn't confident in me as well. I had confidence. It was stolen away with the lack of confidence others has in me. That's my fault and at the same time, I'm like I'll show them but fuck I'm tired. I'm just ready for this to be over. Ross made me feel so completely better at the end of our training session yesterday by telling me that the not one operator has ever been fired over missing an event but leads have. Thank you, Ross.

{Today}

Today is not a good day.